Critisizing Plain Jane part 3: Episode 1 part I

Continuing with my feminist criticism (and snarky rant) of MTV' Plain Jane reality show, here is the first part of my commentary on the first episode of the first season, 'Cristen' (So far, I've only watched and written these commentaries for the first season because there's only so much rubbish I can take, but we'll see if I'll continue or not :S xD).

Part 1: Introduction on why I hate these kind of reality makeover shows
Part 2: Opening credits

Part 4: Episode 1 part II

Part 5: Episode 1 part III
Part 6: Episode 1 part IV
Final part: Episode 1 part V

 Like I mentioned in part 1, these feminist 'reviews' are more of a commentary to the episode,  and a pretty thorough one, I'm afraid, seeing as practically everything is apt to be heavily criticized because of its sheer sexism :/ . Hopefully this commentary will make sense without the need of having to watch this garbage! (of course, if you're curious and want to know the enemy and/or form your own opinions, go ahead, this is just my opinion on the show).

    I’ll be writing a brief summary at the start of each scene/section of the episode so that this remains a bit coherent, but apart from that it's all going to be (snarky) comments about the scenes and as answers to the dialogue in the episode (which will be quoted, appearing in cursive), with some discussions in between about general aspects on which I wish to elaborate a bit more broadly from my feminist point of view (in purple). Like I said, the commentaries can seem a bit disconnected if you aren’t familiar with the episode, but I hope the gist of them remains.

-Disclaimer: This is going to be pretty long, so you’ve been warned! (the reason why I've decided to make a series of posts about this first episode, with my longest commentary, instead of just inserting a read-more break). But if you’re interested in reading a snarky feminist detailed commentary of a sexist makeover show, read on! If not, please don’t go commenting about how boring this is – I’m not the one repeating myself, the sexism in the show is!

So let's get started!

CRISTEN (‘FRIENDZONE JANE’)

-Sexism in the title: The term ‘friendzoning’, which is usually applied to women who offend a male acquaintance because they don't want to engage sexually with him, preferring instead to consider him ‘simply’ as a friend (the nerve! The offense! The oppression!). It’s supposedly a great insult not to give to every man the sex and romantic relationships they’re owed, regardless of your own feelings towards them. In this episode it’s also implied that if you behave and dress ‘like men’(aka favour casual wear and play guitar lol), you won’t get a man because all you do is friendzoning them by doing and enjoying 'similar things' and behaving 'in a similar way'.

Part I:

  -Summary: In which they briefly present the victim – I mean, the misguided and self-conscious ‘Plain Jane’ of the episode – , and show us the highlights we’ll be enjoying during Cristen’s ‘training’ and makeover. The makeover will involve changing her clothing style, her hair and her face (as in make-up), and teaching her how her appearance comes first and how she's expected to be beautiful for her man. The training aspect, meanwhile, involves Cristen suffering needlessly while experiencing her worst fear, plus being electrocuted while being taught how to flirt with and entertain men (yes, seriously), and also being objectified while being taught that learning the secrets of a Cabaret dancer is your best asset when it comes to successfully getting a man. Because it’s super empowering to cater to the male gaze, apparently.

Also, the summary of the MTV Asia online episode is priceless:
   "An uncomfortably shy and messy Jane attempts to shed her "one of the guys" status - along with her plaid flannels - to seduce her longtime crush, who only sees her as a friend."

You and I both, Donna!

 -The stylist-narrator-host starts talking dramatically about how important these dates are:  Such a big deal, such an important moment for a woman - getting a man interested in her. What can possibly compare to that in the whole of a woman's life?

-They arrange these dates. Scripted or not, I find that incredibly intrusive. It also places women in a position of submission and passivity - they're not told 'If you like this guy, go ask him out'. No, they have no part in any decision, and all is planned out for them. It's all surprise, giggles, fits of panic, getting directions on how to dress and how to act and what to do. And a full makeover and transformation, all thought to please the guy. Hell of a role model for young women, and hell of a 'romantic' story. Cinderella 2.0, here we come. Yay.

This is what girls are supposed to do in these episodes: Low self-esteem, and lots of cringing, giggling, self-doubt, passivity and lack of personality. The ultimate role-model, right?

-"We're gonna change the way Tye sees you, so you have to change the way you see you"

So women basically have to hide and change and lie so that the guy finds them attractive. Both to him AND to themselves, which is even worse. The healthy alternative of 'just be yourself, and if he likes that, great, if he doesn't, hey, go look for another one' - That's unthinkable. After all, this series is all about how to alter your appearance so that you please your date and he finds you attractive. And changing the way you see you includes a limited set of options established by an stereotype-based society: Wearing make-up, heels, feminine and sexy clothing, and acting flirtatious. Whether you like it or not. That's basically the.only.damn.way.

You see that body? It's not yours, it's for your man, and I'm going to tell you what you have to wear to look like an attractive woman. Because if you wear plaid, your crush mistakes you for a man, apparently.

-Plus they actually frigging train her to flirt with random guys and engage them in conversation, and if they're bored or uninterested… guess what? They give her electric shocks as punishment. Hell yeah.

Stylist and 'flirting expert' training women like animals so that they learn to entertain their men

-And apparently, in order to win your man, you must indulge your charming trainer-stylist and experiment with your phobias. After all, asking a man out meeting a guy you know for an arranged date, is such an awe-inspiring, terrifying, challenging event that if you face your deepest phobia, you'll be able to face that with no problems! I don't even know why those two situations are even related, in the first place. Do you go face your biggest phobia before sitting an exam or going for a job interview on a daily basis? "I have a difficult exam tomorrow and I'm so nervous, so instead of revising and/or switching off to relax, or doing something even remotely useful in my life…let's go touch some snails! [this girl’s particular phobia]"...Yeah, I thought not.

Because watching frightened women is fun, apparently

-And, of course, she cannot say 'I wanna be more than just your friend' directly and in her everyday clothes, oh no, she must be all decked up and sexy and she must have a date arranged. Yes, I see an awful lot of potential there. 

  -Summary: The show presents Cristen, who is seemingly in a bad state because of her personal style and hobbies, and needs someone to make her crush, Tye, like her. The stylist begins to make her first judgmental remarks about Cristen while watching her video message, and then meets up with her in a café in order to tell her how misguided and ‘tomboyish’ she is.

-Enter Cristen, dressed in casual clothes with a casual hairstyle and no make-up. Message:  She's so awkward and unfeminine! Right??

So they're basically telling us that if you look like this, you're sloppy, unfeminine and won't get a man. There are so many wrongs things about this, they won't fit in a caption, so yeah.

Cristen favours casual, sporty wear, especially, and hang on to your seats,...plaid shirts (Wow, she's such an unattractive tomboy, yuck!), and she's so distressed because she thinks she 'kinda dresses like one of the guys'  (Who thought that in the 21^st Century wearing plaid shirts was dressing like a man?) and that 'she needs help'. "Oh no!" exclaims the obnoxious stylist with distaste and horror when shown Cristen's style in clothing.  Sure, everything that's not dresses and heels is unfeminine and transforms you into 'one of the guys'. Yay progress and 21st Century thinking.  How are we even allowed to wear trousers?!

Btw, her natural hair is also 'ugly' because it's not heat styled and chemical-coloured to an inch of its life, apparently.

Overall, the message is that she's messy and sloppy and, gods forbid!, the worst thing a woman can be…'tomboyish'. Oh, that won't do. "This girl definitely needs my help".

So liking casual wear and plaid shirts means you need help?? In which sort of patriarchal universe? Oh wait

-Extra discussion: So she's so messy and unfeminine exactly why, may I ask?? Because she dresses in plaid shirts, casual-wear?  That is just so sexist and narrow-minded.  The very word 'feminine' as in constructed femininity really bugs me, because 'feminine' and 'masculine' are nothing more than societal, patriarchal constructs that dictate how men and women must look and behave. It's unfair, it's narrow-minded, it's binary thinking. What's this girl doing wrong exactly, having her own style? Of course her friend doesn't tell her he likes her, look at her unfeminine style how could he be interested! But of course, when she starts wearing heels and feminine dresses, that is to say, when she starts conforming to the societal construct of 'femininity', because it is expected of her and not because it fits her personal style, then he'll definitely notice. Oh, such a healthy, open-minded mindset. I bow before your dating advice.

-Cristen also hangs out a lot with her male friends, playing music and watching baseball. That makes her even more unfeminine, as our stylist is quick to say  - 'So you're pretty much a male'. Hey, sure, playing music is unfeminine, let me write that down so that I can bear it in mind because I do that a lot and the gods forbid I appear tomboyish or threaten my inner femininity. And sure, having male friends and enjoying hanging out with them in plaid shirts watching sports and playing guitar basically makes a woman a man. She should be at home sewing in high heels and wearing pink frilly dresses so that people can recognize her as a woman. Sexist thinking at its best.

River definitely doesn't approve of this shit

'That's an easy thing to fix', she says. Gods, how is Cristen even coping, she is so misguided, she should be hanging with a group of girl-friends going out to buy shoes or staying at home painting their nails and gossiping! (an equally offensive idea of what it means to hang out with girls. I personally geek out and play music with girlfriends. It depends on each one's likes, not on their gender, people!).

So it seems that the fact that Cristen likes to hang out with male friends makes her unable to date a guy. It also makes her sloppy and unattractive, because she doesn't care about her looks as much as she should (references to her 'messy' hair, her clothing, her feet being ugly because she actually uses them to play sports, gods forbid, and her nails are not perfectly painted, jeesh). 

So first of all, she has the nerve to believe herself to be at the same level of her male friends, wearing the same comfy clothes and partaking in the same hobbies (as we know, women should hang out with other girls painting their nails and talking about men while men play video games, like The Big Bang Theory showed us again and again). And also, apparently, if you are friends with 'a lot of guys', you just stay their friend. Period. It isn't possible for a man to be feel attracted to you if you enjoy the same things they enjoy and if you don't look sexy and flawless. You have to stay gender segregated following the masculinity and femininity constructs in every way, from clothes to activities, so that attraction can work. Playing music and using your feet to kick a ball? Instant turn-off, folks. Write that down, ladies!

 The narrow-mindedness is so glaring it physically hurts, and I've just mentioned what happens in the first three minutes. 

-'You go straight into the friendzone instead of a sexy, seductive, pretentious girlfriend': That's the role model we must fulfill if we want to get off with someone. We must be sexy. We must be seductive. We must be pretentious (is that even a good thing??). Casual, sporty, friendly, easy-going, nice, enjoying hobbies that are not the limited 'feminine' things to do? SHARING INTERESTS AND LIKING EACH OTHER IN A MORE EQUAL LEVEL? Yuck.

-Did I mention the corny background music? Because hell, it’s cringeworthy.

-Also. Reasons why Cristen likes Tye (the male crush in this episode). 'He's really cute...really tall...really handsome...really good-looking'.  So basically she lists appearance, too.  Such deep feelings. All right, appearance does have a factor in sexual attraction and all that, obviously, but are those the only reasons she likes him? Does she even know him as a person, really? Please don't make these corny (and sexist) reality rubbish in order to tell us again that this is love. This is attraction. A crush. It's totally OK, totally natural, but let's not mix terms for young girls, please. And love certainly doesn't involve changing yourself for your crush. 

 Only, of course, he doesn't have to alter his looks in order to be attractive to her. But she does. Oh boy, that she does.

-'I want to work on your confidence building'.

 Please tell me again why having that particular style and those hobbies and friends makes her have low confidence in this script? Believing that a person must CHANGE and alter their way of looking and thinking in order to be attractive to another person is what truly gives good reason for them to have low confidence about themselves.

 You are not helping girls to boost their confidence. You're making them think that their way of looking, of dressing, of hanging out and of thinking is not right, and that she won't get the crush of her dreams until she changes. Way to go.

Molly has a crush and she doesn't approve of  this sexist crap

And she isn't even remotely ashamed to state it just like that: 'working on your confidence'  means learning how to flirt and be seductive. Hell yeah.  You make a man attracted to you if you learn how to bat your eyelashes seductively. To hell about being yourself and attracting someone because they noticed the real you and liked it.

-When talking about Tye, people mention his being 'smart', 'talented' and 'awesome', as well as good-looking. Does anyone ever mention that Cristen is smart or talented? Nope. She's just unfeminine, tomboyish, sloppy and self-conscious because she isn't the flawless sexy woman she's supposed to be. The inner Cristen? Who cares!  All she needs is to be trained for two days in order to become more beautiful and sophisticated, as well as seductive and flirty.  Because that's what's going to matter, not her brains or any other aspect of her character. We don't even know what she studies and/or does for a living. Only that she likes music, but hey, that makes her tomboyish, so no luck there.

-Summary: The stylist phones Tye and gets him to accept a blind date in two days time. After that pretty invasive call, Cristen and our favourite stylist drive in search of the male crush of this episode and proceed to stalk him while praising his virtues and manliness. Sexist creepiness ftw.

-When they're stalking Tye, just the background music tells us just how active, awesome, empowered and macho he is. 'Cute, tall, sporty'. 

And he doesn't get points off for playing sports, right? Must be a nice life.

This is the male crush, he's already perfect, he makes all the choices, is allowed his own style, and he's also allowed to play sports. No, I don't see a double standard here...not at all

-And I have to say this. All this for what? If Cristen has been friends with him for a few years and she wants to take the relationship further, why doesn't she ask him about it, or ask some friends to help her if she's feeling shy?  This is all orchestrated for the sake of the show, but anyway,  does she really need to go through all that? I don't think so.

-Incidentally, the stylist seems to like to call herself a 'fairy godmother' for doing all this. I weep for humanity.

To be continued...

Critisizing Plain Jane. Part 2: Description and Intro

Following with my MTV Plain Jane feminist criticism (and snarky attack) (Part 1: Introduction here), let’s take a look at the great description and intro of this show:

You can watch the intro here

"PLAIN JANE" is a new summer reality series that transforms one woman from the inside out to reveal a brand new woman. Each of the eight episodes will feature a new "Jane" searching for the change of a lifetime. With the help of British fashion expert Louise Roe ("Fashion Police: The 2009 Grammy Awards"), each "Plain Jane" will receive a head-to-toe style transformation, including new wardrobe and confidence-building exercises. Once the transformation is complete, the formerly "Plain Jane" will surprise her unsuspecting crush with the new look and reveal her true feelings to him. A love connection is - or isn't - made.

Charming description, isn’t it? Just like a fairytale!

And the intro is even better! (I have omitted the ‘Hello, I am Louise Roe, the world's best stylist with a frightening sexist mindset’ line - which didn't run like that of course - because it didn't add much to the criticism and I'm not wasting typing time on her, thanks).

 "Meet Plain Jane. She's ordinary, awkward and forgettable. Every Plain Jane has a secret crush, but she can't imagine telling him how she feels. And that's where I come in (…) My job is to help every Plain Jane come out of her shell by facing her biggest fear head on and being transformed into a new woman with style and confidence to surprise the man of her dreams on a romantic date. Will it be true love? Find out in Plain Jane!”

Just the title is so freaking offensive. 'Plain Jane' - Let's turn a "plain girl" ('plain' according to your narrow-minded standards, of course) into a sexy princess so that she gets her prince. Nice, respectful.

 "Meet Plain Jane. She's ordinary, awkward and forgettable - So everyone who doesn't conform to your sexist and very limited rules based on patriarchal gender roles and the beauty and fashion industries is 'not special', unattractive,, forgettable, and awkward. Wow. So respectful. I'm digging this attitude.

Every Plain Jane has a secret crush - Yes, because the major problem of any girl is to find a man - heteronormativity is also the norm here, remember - who will find her acceptable and sufficiently attractive!! And this guy comes into the intro with self-confident manly swag and bravado included, because he’s perfect already.

But she can't imagine telling him how she feels - Because she is oh-so-awkward and because apparently all girls who don't wear heels and/or make-up on a daily basis can't be confident and direct enough to ask someone out. Suuuuure.

And that's where I come in (…) My job is to help every Plain Jane come out of her shell... - Because if she's different in some way from your COMPULSORY flirty/sexy/feminine/cute patriarchal af mold she must be in a shell and in need of some change and a sexist fairy godmother to give her a dress and a pair of heels, OBVIOUSLY.

...by facing her biggest fear head on... - You think? That's a woman's biggest fear?? Asking a guy out? Oh, do educate yourself and respect women's lives and goals a little bit more! My biggest fear here would be that I would be forced to endure this kind of makeover, to be honest xD

...and being transformed into a new woman - Transformed. They don't even try to lie about this -  with style and confidence... Again, to these people confidence means altering someone's style and personality so that she fits in with society's limited ideas, right? I guess her original syle wasn't her true inner style, she just needed someone to change her, lucky her for finding you!

...to surprise the man of her dreams -  all for him, folks, never forget that!-  on a romantic date. 

Will it be true love? - True love? Seriously? You make a girl think that she can only go out with someone by dressing and behaving in a certain way, to please her crush so that he finds her desirable enough, and you call that love?  ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?? That kind of relationship-wannabe doesn’t even deserve to be called legit ‘attraction’!!)'

This series sucks.so.much!

I can't wait to rip it apart here *muahaha*

Tolkien essays - Las Traducciones de Rivendell

This below is an essay I wrote in 2011 for the seasonal magazine of the Spanish Tolkien Society, Estel (No. 72, pdf included below as well). I tackled the Spanish translation of 'Rivendell', a place name that, contrary to pretty much the rest of toponyms in Tolkien's world, keeps being wrongly translated - in my opinion - in most of the Spanish Tolkien material, books and film dubbing alike. 

In the 6-page essay, I talk about Tolkien's own translating advice and guidelines, describe the way that 'Rivendell' has been translated into a number of languages, focus on the Spanish translation choices and give my opinion on the matter and my personal choices in order to translate the name of the Elven settlement in Eriador.

This essay is, for the moment being, in Spanish only, but I am open to translate it into English in the future if someone expresses that interest :).

'The Hidden Valley' by ArwendeLuhtiene (me) on DeviantArt

-Estel No. 72. My essay is on the pages 2-5:

And a pdf version of the essay (once again, in Spanish):

Critisizing Plain Jane. Part 1: Why I hate makeover shows

Once I accidentally stumbled across this makeover show called ‘Plain Jane’ while zapping. I’m not a huge television fan, I usually stick to streaming and watching movies and series on the laptop, and I think I end up zapping about twice a year, give or take. One good reason for this is that I always end up encountering gender stereotypes and sexism everywhere I go. And this show is a particularly nasty example of that. So nasty that, after finding it twice in my unfortunate zapping sessions, I got so angry I had to do something about it.

So now I'm finally counter-attacking by officially criticizing this sexist rubbish like it deserves *snarky activist mode on*! And that involved enduring the torture of watching through the whole first season in order to criticize the hell out of every single line (NEVER AGAIN!!), so yeah, I was invested in this xD

Why this particular show? There are many makeover reality shows like this one around, but this one I found especially obnoxious and sexist. And maybe I can’t change much by writing snarky rants, but I think that the messages in these kind of shows (and the fact that there’s more than one aggravates the problem) are so awful and so unhealthy and toxic for both women and men (and especially for young girls and teenagers) that someone should point out how utterly wrong they are from time to time, even if we can’t achieve a lot by it.

And even though I had this written roughly months ago, this kind of criticism is, I think, now more important than ever. First we got glorification of abusive relationships "thanks to" the likes of Twilight or 50 Shades of Grey. And now, thanks to the new action Disney movie, Cinderella seems to be becoming ‘cool’ and a ‘great role model for women’ again as well – And I find that particularly troubling, especially after the effort that Brave, Frozen and Maleficent tried to make regarding more empowered female role models for girls and women. Cinderella’s story of a girl who’s rewarded with a prince because she’s beautiful and puts up with everyone’s crap passively (which apparently means being 'good', and I don't buy the usage of the 'have courage and be kind' phrase in a context completely devoid of the gendered roles in this story, sorry :S). She then gets a makeover, of course, so that the random dude can look at her and find her attractive enough to marry - actually the basis of this sort of reality show. And most young girls, still growing up with these stories, do believe that if you are beautiful and kind to everyone (including but not limited to your abusers and the dude who literally has to identify you with a shoe because he can't remember how you look like even after the effort you took with your makeover), your life is pretty much fulfilled and happiness will surely come without any effort (and happiness in these stories usually means ending up with a man in a traditional relationship full of gender roles, which is definitely not everybody’s definition of ‘happy ending’, and definitely not the ideal relationship, either, if we take into account both the fact that the women are told to be pretty passive and they only barely get to know the man before they marry him).

Who cares about archery and an adventurous spirit, or about ice powers and finding oneself? Being pretty, putting up with crap with a smile (...I mean, being good!), wearing a pretty dress with a veeeery tight corset (liberal feminists: 'Actually, historical corsets were not uncomfortable and not a double standard even though men never had to wear them, and it's her 'choice'!') and losing a veeeery high-heeled shoe, those are your best...and only...chances at being happy and impressing the man you've just met!

Plus I found a disturbing number of positive comments on this particular makeover show and others like it, in places such as YouTube or the MTV site. Young girls and women commenting about how jealous they are of the 'Plain Janes' in the show, and how better they look after the makeover, and how romantic the plot is. Frankly scary.

There are so many things that are so wrong with this show. Everything about it is plain sexism. It’s a 100% sexist ‘Ugly Duckling meets Cinderella' makeover show, full to the brim with awful messages for young girls and women. It's all about how to alter your appearance and personality (wait, does that even matter? *scoffs*) so that you please your male date. Because apparently, you can only get a boyfriend if you conform to society's rules about what it means to be 'feminine' and 'sexy'.  Apparently, the only important thing is that HE finds you attractive. According to this show, 'building up your confidence' is equal to 'Hey, let's change your appearance and personality so that you please your date!'. Sounds pretty legit, right?

 All the episodes of this appalling show start with a girl who’s self-conscious, passive and has no luck in love because she is shown with no make-up, wearing casual clothes, a casual hairstyle and lacks a flirty, sexy personality. So what does she need but a makeover featuring a new style of clothing that must always be “cute”, “feminine” and/or “sexy”, plus make-up and those compulsory heels, in order to 'build up her personality' and succeed with their date! But her appearance isn’t the only important thing, oh no, her personality is also taken into account! She also learns how to flirt and give a man conversation, and must have her original personality completely ignored and, if possible, altered. Voila! Love is 100% ensured! 

'Hey there, nice to meet you! Allow me to tell you that your whole life as a woman has been a lie until you met me. I'm here to objectify you, change your personality and style, and transform you so that your male crush likes you!  During the whole time, I'll be relying heavily on a variety of misogynistic gender stereotypes and subjective personal tastes and opinions that you should, of course, adopt in order for your life to have some meaning. I'm such a nice person, I help girls and women so much!'

Not only do I find all this astoundingly narrow-minded, demeaning, sexist, offensive, invasive and the total opposite of making you confident - The main idea about these episodes, apart from the fact that your looks are pretty much everything that matters in order to get a boyfriend, is that being yourself is not OK…unless you're already the sexy/cute/feminine woman you're supposed to be, of course.  The most frightening thing about this kind of shows? While they’re probably mostly scripted beforehand, they could be absolutely real and they don’t only promote sexist stereotypes and double standards – they get inspiration from the real world.

• 'Plain Jane' tells women that getting a man is supposed to be one of the essential aspects of their life. If you don't get a man, I’m sorry, but you fail as a woman.  And the only way to get one is to have a makeover and think about what they like all the time. Yay equality.

•   It focuses mainly on a woman's appearance, altering and shaping  it so that she is acceptably sexy and attractive to males. There are also only limited ways to be 'sexy'. If you do not conform to any of this, you're not even worthy of being considered a woman, probably.

Most of the 'how to succeed in your date' tips they give is about looking good. A woman can hardly be confident and successful, let alone get a man!, if she isn’t attractive and feminine and sexy. Hair, shoes, clothing, make-up and sexy attitude, that’s the ONLY way to go. What a message to girls. Oh, and you also need to know how to flirt and give a man entertaining conversation. Talk about an egalitarian relationship, and indeed *scoffs*, about "love".

NO ONE NEEDS A MAKEOVER. Not for a man, not for anyone. You DON’T HAVE TO CHANGE your style, aspect, character or personality for ANYONE. And honesly, blast anyone who thinks you have.

•    Being yourself is wrong if you do not conform. Self-esteem is not being yourself, it's about conforming to society's fashion and stereotype rules. Then, bam! Empowerment! Success! Romance!

•   Tells people that not conforming to society's rules is bad and unattractive. A woman who likes casual wear, for example, isn't 'graceful' or even a ‘woman’, apparently, and if she doesn't wear heels or make-up she’s basically going to be unlovable in every single sense. Compulsory femininity is enforced to the highest degree.

 One of the main messages in this show is that, in order to win a man, you must NOT be yourself. You must be sexy and attractive, and only according to a very limited established mindset. If you are not, you have  a makeover done.  And forget your own style, there’s only one acceptable style: Make-up, high heels, non-hair-friendly hair products, a compulsory hair-cut just frigging because, and cute/sexy/feminine styles of clothing are the one and only key factors in order to win your man.  Being confident while rocking your own preferred style? Not an option. If you have longer-than-deemed-acceptable and/or less styled/”messier” hair, or a more casual/sportive look about you,  or if you don’t wear make-up everyday or ever, or  if you prefer comfy footwear rather than high heels, and especially if you wear “unfeminine” clothing (which can include anything from baggy clothing to pretty much everything that is comfortable…well, virtually everything but heels, tube skirts and frilly dresses, apparently)...Forget about it, you won't dazzle a man in a date. Which should be your main goal in life, remember?

Being yourself doesn't matter. Your man, and people in general, will ONLY love you when you are attractive, feminine, sexy and/or cute, and, very importantly, when you follow society's tastes and conventions to the letter. Be sexy, be cute, be feminine, but only in the way I tell you to, put on the clothes and shoes that I give you, don’t do that anymore, throw out those clothes and those hobbies of yours already. If you are different in any way, people won't love you. Your crush won't love you. You're handling your life wrong. How dare you have your own style and your own hobbies, for heaven's sake?

•  Featuring an incredibly obnoxious, prejudiced, dogmatic, and generally sexist presenter-stylist who states society's rules and her tastes as universal truths. I am massively pissed off when someone thinks themselves entitled to manipulate other people in this way and tell them what to do with their frigging lives. This is the ultimate Umbridge-Capitol stylist female figure of patriarchy, selling the idea that there is only one way of being attractive (the sexy/feminine/cute style outtake, which is all fine if chosen freely, but oppressive and sexist if applied to every women by force), and that being attractive is the only way to 'boost your confidence' and get a man. NOT COOL AT ALL.

•  Notice that the men who are going to get the girl in their date don't get asked to change ANYTHING about themselves. Except for showing some chivalry and romantic rubbish to impress their princess. But no demands regarding their appearance, tastes or general personality. Because PRIVILEGE.

All in all, yeah, not my version of a date. If you're going to date someone, which should be your own choice and not a pressure from society, by the way, you want to be yourself and not masquerade and lie to fit society's standards in order to please your date. If you change your style and your appearance and lie about your personality to please someone, you're doing the worst you can do in a relationship. You might ‘get a man’ (of course, this show is strictly heteronormative), but said man won't "love" you for who you are, which I guess is not the point of a short-to-long-term relationship. Supposedly, you've chosen that date because they like something about you, and hopefully, it will not only be your looks. Hopefully, they'll like something about your personality (if they don't and you’re looking for a relationship and not just casual sex [which is perfectly fine as well, obviously], why even bother to lie about anything? - and I actually don't think this kind of forced makeovers are necessary when it comes to casual sex, either). 
Even regarding your looks, supposedly you shouldn't need to change your style or hair for a date either, if the date already feels attracted to you! What the hell. Morphing into a high-heeled individual with tons of foundation and a tube skirt if it's not *your style to begin with* is turning into someone else, and doing anyone no favours. Naturally, one does want to look nicer on a special occassion, but preferably while being true to themselves and their style, I guess. If I don't like stiletto heels, for example, why  should I wear them randomly to a date, prioritizing society's enforced gender norms over me? Just wear what you like and feel comfortable in. Personal style, your own personality and the confidence and self-esteem that comes from all that, that's what should be considered 100% sexy and attractive. Just my 2 cents.

This new series of feminist criticism posts will feature a pretty exhaustive criticism of each episode in the first season, plus an additional short post criticizing the title description before that. I really do not recommend watching that rubbish, better save your time for better things, and it's actually pretty fortunate that it's not that easy to find online (I tried MTV in various countries). My snarky commentary tries to follow the episodes in detail, copying many of the lines, so, unless you're curious and want to have a taste of how horrible this series is, I guess the commentary alone should be reasonably easy to understand without having seen the episodes.

So, if you're interested, I'll see you in part II :)!

This unnecessary gender bias is sheer stupidity

Brainwashing children into thinking that they must favour certain colours, activities or role-models just because of their gender is a special pet peeve of mine. Not only am I routinely angered to no end by the strict dichotomy that exists between "boys' " and "girls' " toys. You know, that poorly disguised and one-direction-only attempt to direct girls straight into the pink-and-pink doll, beauty and house appliances department, and boys to the red-and-blue realm of action heros, scientific games and cars - all while pretending that cultural stereotypes and society have never played any role at all, and hiding all the number of girls and boys that don't especially like their assigned toys and activities when it comes to lying to people with statistics: Because it's all genetics, folks! As a girl, I was born with the special gene designed to appreciate pink and dolls over anything else! Biological determinists with some serious sexist brainwashing ftw!

Well, now it seems that I should be worried, and angered, about the food as well. Because boys and girls need this kind of gender bias brainwashing to feel enticed into buying and eating chocolate. Obviously. It's quite clear that girls need that pale pink incentive ridden with hearts and Disney princesses in all their artificial beauty in order to enjoy their chocolate, while boys need that red-and-blue packaging with, in this case, planes (but superheroes or cars would also do). Because even when wanting chocolate, children (and adults as well), need some gender bias in their lives to keep them interesting.  

I remember seeing this in a local supermarket a couple of months ago, flipping out, and thinking about the number of parents who, brainwashed themselves by the societal gender stereotypes, will choose the 'correct' wrapping according to their children's sex without any second thoughts. Perhaps you will think - But this is fun and colourful, and children can choose whichever they like! Yep, same way girls nearly always choose pink and Barbie and boys nearly always choose blue and planes. because they've seen and they've been taught all these gender bias BS since the day they were born. But no worries, people will scream at you when you mention the phrase "cultural impact" and proceed to explain it all by referencing their innate biology and falsifying statistical surveys that have the nerve to call themselves 'scientific'. 

 And if you think that is hardly an important issue, think about how far society goes in order to manipulate and brainwash people into accepting unnecessary and non-existent 'innate' differences in likes, aspirations and abilities between women and men. This chocolate brand took the time, effort and money to create two separate wrappings in order to make girls and boys believe they must like and choose different things just because of their gender. And that, frankly, scares me. And it also scares me that it doesn't scare you.

The Wheel of the Year: Samhain

So here we  are, Samhain, the beginning of the Dark half of the Celtic year. A blessed three-day long Samhain to all those who celebrate it and may no evil spirits find you tonight - or humans getting drunk and throwing eggs at strangers' houses because "yay, FUN!"...which might be way worse, now I think of it *facepalms while weeping at humanity's twisted view of what it is to "have fun"*

Samhain might be my least favourite festivity in the Celtic/neopagan/neodruidic Wheel of the Year, although I do admit the neodruidic and Celtic-inspired feast can have a strong charm of its own. As an agnostic neodruidess, my activities during these three days (31 October - 2 November, seeing as Samhain festivities traditionally lasted for three days) usually consist on a walk in the garden or a trip to the mountains, plus a seasonal plant adornment in my kitchen 'agnostic altar', plus a cake, usually including pumpkin and/or nuts.                                  

 The current Halloween festivities, however, generally annoy me. I've got no problem with people dressing up, I'm a cosplayer myself. And it isn't because 'it isn't a traditional feast in the area', an argument I'm frankly tired of reading and hearing. You can enjoy any festivity disregardless of your area as long as you like it, feel drawn to it and are respectful about it,  My reasons are:

1.  All the death and horror themes, which are generally not to my liking. 

2.  I associate it with the days becoming shorter and the illogical decision of shortening the already short days courtesy of the infamous Winter time change. Not a fan of short days, or cold, for that matter.

3. But what I really, really dislike about Halloween is the way people 'have fun'. Once again, dressing up, having a party, that's all good. Not so good if your main aim is getting drunk at a park and potentially bothering people, though. And how the hell is going from house to house throwing eggs and putting toothpaste in door knobs even remotely OK??  Would these people (kids, teenagers, adults, there's a bit of everything) enjoy it if I suddenly came and threw eggs all over their house, and then defended my right to have fun, calling them 'intolerant weirdos'?? Do you know how bad day-old eggs smell? Do you know how disgusting it is to clean  that up? Why is it even remotely OK that I have to clean rotten eggs up in my goddam house so that some egotistical drunk teenager idiots and some spoiled kids, sometimes with their morally-dubious, irresponsible parents actually accompanying them while they throw rubbish at people's houses (A+ parenting!!), have FUN?!  Having fun does not mean having a go at people in this way, since last I looked. Seriously, if you like throwing eggs and stuff so much, why don't you go throw them at your own windows and walls? Don't want to clean that up afterwards, right?  And let's not talk about the assholes that throw eggs and stuff at buses and cars. Not only have the poor bus drivers to clean all that up after their whole day's work - they could cause a damn accident!

  *Ugh*

So anyway, to celebrate Samhain today :) I've decided to post a series of Power Point slides that I made about the festivity and the seasonal gods and goddesses according to Celtic mythology.  The Irish+English+Spanish texts are part of a show about the Celtic festivities that I and my fellow Irish students and teachers prepared and took part in during 2011-2012. 

-DISCLAIMER about the images:  I always try to credit every image I use in my blogs, same as I'd like people to do with my own artwork and photographs. I really like to illustrate my posts and projects, and I deeply appreciate the work of all the artists and photographers that make that possible. However, it's not always easy to credit a picture, seeing as most of them come from Google searchs and many lack watermarks. All of this makes the job of tracing back each picture to its owner/artist/original page very difficult. I do try to take my time in order to do this, but I don't always succeed. So I'll gladly credit any picture that remains here uncredited, if you know who's the original artist. And if you find you own some of the pictures shown here and you don't want me posting your (credited) work in this blog, please do let me know as well!

 -Morrígan's name is spelled in a variety of ways, from 'Mórrigan', to 'Morrígan', to 'Morrigán', to 'Mórrigán', to even 'Mórrígán'. Personally, I enjoy the last version quite a lot, although I alternate from time to time.

Geeky London trip 2014: Doctor Who haul

Continuing the fandom-centric parts from my geeky trip to London, here is what I got in the Who Shop (for my visit to the shop, see previous post here):

Both my mum and I got Ten's sonic screwdriver (I want to cosplay Ten and she wants to cosplay Nine, but the screwdrivers are pretty much the same except for the colour of the case - Ninth's is bluish). I also got a model of the TARDIS.

The items out of the packaging:

The TARDIS I got is the 'Spin and Fly TARDIS' (This one). It's sturdy and very nicely made. The level of detailing is also very good, from the wood texture, to the windows, the lantern top and the 'Pull to Open' sign. The colour shows darker on the pics, but it's very close to the trademark 'TARDIS blue' in real life. The doors open to show a curvy 'bigger on the inside' view of the console room:

This model simulates the TARDIS' take off and landing sequences (also the vortex buzzing) with sound effects and the top lantern blinking on and off. The sounds are cool, but way louder than I expected! This TARDIS also has a detachable transparent 'flight cradle' attached, so you can spin it (by hand). It's definitely not the best feature of this model, as it's cumbersome and tiring to spin smoothly. 

                                        

  

Ten's screwdriver plastic replica (this one) is a pretty cool prop, well-made, with button-activated light and sound effects (four options). Very happy with it :). Of course, one always wishes it was the real deal so that I could open doors, repair stuff, do sciency scans and fight aliens xD. But even considering its limitations, I find it really very cool :D

After visiting the Who Shop, we went back to the hotel and proceeded to play with our sonics while eating chocolate, so here's a video featuring the four sound effects:

Next Geeky London Trip post will feature Harry Potter :)

Geeky London trip 2014: The Who Shop

UPDATED: So regarding fandoms and this blog, I leave most of the fandoms stuff for my Tumblr blog here, but from time to time I'll be posting geeky stuff here as well, especially if reviews or feminist writing are involved (especially given that I'm the writes-a-lot type and I don't want to flood my Tumblr with lots of writing as yet xD). 

*END OF UPDATE*

So, first geeky-site review! I've recently come back from a geeky holiday in London (with my equally geeky mum) and I have so many geeky pics to share ^^. During our stay in London, we focused on three fandoms: Sherlock BBC (my favourite fandom!), Harry Potter and Doctor Who. 

I'm relatively new to Doctor Who, although I'm steadily beginning to identify with the word 'Whovian' and am currently the proud owner of  my very own sonic screwdriver ^^. General info about me and DW includes Ten and Nine being my fave doctors and loving the TARDIS :). And I'm still interested in writing reviews of DW episodes from a feminist point of view, btw (just, I haven't got a lot of spare time at the moment, that's why there's only one review here. But I've already drafted a couple more). 

   So, during our stay in London we decided to pay the Who Shop a visit. Emboldened by our desire to get a model of the TARDIS and sonic screwdrivers xD (just because they're cool :), and for our future cosplays as well), we undertook the relatively lengthy journey to this whovian destination in Upton Park. 

   I had read that this area was a bit dodgy, but, to tell the truth, I didn't find it all that different from other parts of London. It's not central London, granted, but (at least during the morning) I didn't find it that dodgy-desolate as I had been expecting, which was a good thing. The only unsavoury people we met was a brute of a woman shouting and hitting her children for asking her water on the tube back to central London (poor kids :( ).

   After getting off the tube, we decided to go the opposite way and ended up taking one bus to nearly Canary Wharf (the fates wanted me to experience feels again, it seems), and then another back to where we should have been going. Turned out that London A-Z was right and it was a short walking distance from the Upton Park tube, only the numbers on the streets were a bit jumbled up and we decided that turning right instead of left was the right thing to do xD. Well, at least we got some fish and chips for lunch.

    So after our little adventure, here we were (click on pics for larger image):

The shop is biggish and TARDIS blue (obviously). The shop windows were pretty cool as well, with lots of random Whovian merchandising, daleks and a cardboard cutout of Ten included:

The interior of the shop was satisfyingly geeky, even for one who doesn't still fully identify as Whovian. They had quite a lot of stuff, such as TARDISes, Daleks (both full size decorative models and merchandising), books, magazines, toys, prop replicas, some costumes, plastic screwdrivers with light and sound effects (we got two of those, Ten's - my mum will cosplay Nine because he's her favourite, but the screwdriver is basically the same), DVDs and CDs, and T-shirts, among other stuff.

 Regarding the T-shirts, they had some female sizes as well as male, yay for a bit more equality. Although there wasn't a lot of variety, imo, and the sizing, even if female-intended, was still too large for me. I don't see why thin-structured people like me can't have geeky T-shirts that fit us snugly (it is a bother to be a female geek and like snug clothing rather than loose clothing!). And the same for larger people. Such limited sizing is not cool (anywhere in the clothes industry, but specifically in the geek culture industry) :/.

There were also some Star Trek and Sherlock items (just some T-shirts and books in the last case). My mum got a cool Sherlock T-shirt with 221B on it, and we also got a cute (and shared) TARDIS model with sound and light effects.

One of the two full-sized TARDISes in the shop, and the full-sized Dalek (with 'Don't touch or you will be exterminated' on it):

And here's me having fun with the (very fearsome xD) Dalek. I've always thought they're kinda cute, but it actually sort of freaks one out a bit when you have a full-sized one standing right next to you in real life...Laughing at it in the pics might not have been a great idea, now I think about it...:D

                                       

The shop also includes a small museum with some costumes and props, some of them replicas, some original, and mainly classic Who-themed. I personally didn't find it all that thrilling (I wasn't expecting Cardiff Who experience level (which I still haven't visited), but perhaps a little bit more). Also, I'm hardly familiar with classic Who yet, so that's probably  another factor why I wasn't thrilled about it.

The visit to the museum included unlocking and stepping into one of the model TARDISes, and that was pretty awesome on its own and totally worth it, though! (Please notice the fact that we both decided to wear something blue :) ):

 

And more fun pics with the TARDIS! 

     

                                                

I like this pic a lot :). TARDIS aside, hey, my hair's looking long! From my perspective, it usually doesn't feel that long to me, so cool :)

And because we need a rant of sorts in an activist blog (feel free to skip. If not, read more):

 The staff of the shop was friendly and helpful, but there was one thing I didn't quite like about the Who Shop, and that is their photograph policy. Apparently, you can only take pics in the TARDIS if you've paid to see the 'museum', and you can take pics of the items in the 'museum', but you cannot post them online (I'm sorry, but what's exactly the point of that, from a fan's point of view? I didn't feel like taking any pics because I'm not familiar with Classic!Who yet, but still, didn't quite understand. Do they think that people won't come to visit their museum if there are pics online? Personally, seeing pics of places where I want to go further motivates me to go and gives me an idea of what to expect). You apparently can't make videos either (once again, I find video tours pretty helpful before visiting the actual place). Also, donating the museum fees to charity is pretty nice, but I still think that donations should be about free choice, rather than a part of compulsory fees to get into a museum.